First of all, we believe the Bible to be true and inerrant.
For example, homosexuality is sin, and fornication
is sin. This shall always be. But sins are forgivable,
and many or even all of the after-effects can be erased or
healed after repentance.
We do not embrace any liberal worldly theologies, but
there is a liberty in the Holy Ghost, not bondage:
"Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty." [2 Cor 3:17]
Matt 19--
The Pharisees asked Jesus, "Is it lawful for a man to put away
his wife for EVERY cause." Jesus said divorce is illegal in God's
eyes, "EXCEPT IT BE FOR FORNICATION." In your case both
she and he were in fornication with other partners while separated,
so there was legal ground for divorce. The Pharisees wanted to divorce
for ANY reason, which is wrong. Whether or not your girlfriend
committed adultery, it is sure that her ex-husband has. She is
free from him on that basis. As to her own adultery: God has thrown
her past sins into the sea of forgetfulness:
"I, even I , Am He that blotteth out thy transgressions for Mine Own sake,
and will not remember thy sins." [Isa 43:25]
If God has forgotten your girlfriend's sin, then it is ungodly for her
to remind God or herself of the negative past. Her adultery is forgotten.
There is no record. It is blotted out:
"I have blotted out, as a thick cloud, thy transgressions, and, as a
cloud, thy sins ..." [Isa 44:22]
She is a new creature: "... If any man [woman] be in Christ, he [she] is a
new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become
new." [2 Cor 5:17]
Not only is her background "passed away," but she
is not the same person that did the crime; she is a new creature!
Your girlfriend's ex-husband is unsaved according to my understanding
of your story:
"... If the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is
NOT under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace."
[1 Cor 7:15] In this verse, there was NO fornication, yet God allowed divorce.
The question remaining is "re-marriage."
Furthermore, your girlfriend is alive in Christ. Her ex-husband is spiritually
dead:
"We know that we have passed from death unto life, because we love
the brethren. He that loveth not his brother abideth in death." [1 Jn 3:14]
An unsaved person is dead, according to the above verse.
"... If the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband.
So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married to another man,
she shall be called an adulteress: but if her husband be dead, she is
free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she be married to
another man." [Rom 7:2,3]
Even if her ex-husband should get saved, his old man that she was
married to is dead:
"Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of
sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin.
For he that is dead is freed from sin. Now if we be dead with Christ,
we believe that we shall also live with him." [Rom 6:6-8]
Jesus came not to destroy the LAW, but to fulfill it. (Matt 5:17)
The LAW says regarding divorce and re-marriage:
"When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass
that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some
uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and
give it into her hand, and send her out of the house. And when she is
departed out of his house, she may go and be another man's wife."
[Deut 24:1,2]
The Law is a school master and a mirror to teach us and show us
that we have sinned, so we'll know how drastically we need Jesus.
The law is not our taskmaster, but our friend leading us to Jesus.
Remember Hosea. God COMMANDED him to marry a prostitute.
"And the Lord said unto Hosea, Go, take unto thee a wife of whoredoms
and children of whoredoms ... so he went and took Gomer the daughter
of Diblaim; which conceived, and bare him a son." [Hosea 1:2,3]
God doesn't change, but we change, and our perspective of Him changes:
"I Am the Lord, I change not ..." [Mal 3:6]
"Jesus Christ, the same yesterday, today, and forever." [Heb 13:8]
Based on Hosea [above] we have proof that there are circumstances
ordained by God today whereby we can marry people that have been in
fornication.
"What therefore God [NOT man] hath joined together, let not man
put asunder." [Matt 19:6]:
Your girlfriend's father made her marry, because he said that having
children out of wedlock is immoral. Actually, sex out of wedlock
is immoral, but once the brief sinful act is committed, the pregnancy
itself is a work of God; only God can give life. There are scriptures to support
a "shotgun"wedding and scriptures against it also. It is a Bible checkmate.
I won't quote those scriptures because they cancel out. It proves that God
is FLEXIBLE according to the situations, people's hearts, and each
destiny involved. He knows all the facts and parameters, and outcomes.
For example: let us picture a situation where a Christian girl backslides
and has sex with an unsaved man, then she repents. The Bible says
not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers. Generally, she should not
marry him.
On the other hand, God gives gifts such as faith, the word of wisdom, etc.
The Holy Spirit could give this Christian girl the faith or knowledge in
advance that her unsaved sex partner will one day get saved. All things
are possible with God.
In your case, it seems that your girlfriend's father forced the marriage,
therefore God did not join them together---man did!!
The Lord also says that Moses the servant and prophet of God allowed
divorce and re-marriage because of the "hardness of your heart."
Scripturally, your girlfriend's heart was hard before and after the marriage.
Now her heart is tender. Years ago, because of her hard heart and
because of her father's hard heart, no one involved could hear the
Lord saying, "Don't get married, because I have not arranged this marriage."
Now your hearts are tender in the Lord. He says, "My sheep hear my voice."
You can hear His voice yourselves on this marriage question. He speaks
through the Bible, through other Christians, angels, dreams, visions,
and circumstances (because the Lord controls or allows the circumstances).
Throughout this writing I believe the Lord has been speaking to me that
divorce and re-marriage is not the issue here. You both need to discern
whether to marry ANY person at all, regardless of their background.
If you marry, all marriages have certain problems that single people don't.
But it is better to marry than to burn in your lusts. It is sin for a minister
to play God and dogmatically say, "Do not marry," according to 1 Tim 4:2,3:
"... Having their conscience seared with a hot iron: forbidding to marry ..."
The minister can, however, give you a prophecy to that regard. Prophecy
is to be judged. It may be incorrect, because we prophesy in part. The
minister can also give his educated opinion based on wisdom gained by
experience.
If we were to suppose that divorce and re-marriage is not the issue here,
it remains that it is better to remain single, but if you marry, you do not sin.
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